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Brian
I don’t entirely believe you. Your downtrodden demeanor after reading my last blog, your blow up and walk out when I asked if you wanted to be with me, the way you lock your phone and make sure it’s always on you, to the point that you won’t put it on the charger overnight, your […]
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Mother
At judgment, God spoke to me of you. First he shriveled up my hands and made them cramp like yours. He wanted me to be sensitive to your pain as we proceeded through the conversation. He allowed me to hate you, but as I did, my hands would cramp. “You don’t want to wind up […]
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Ha-ha.
It really was a joke, you know? God told me that this ending with Brian was seeded in its beginning. I had cheated on Dakota with Brian. Then I’d left Brian for Dakota. Then I’d come back. How could Brian have trusted me after all of that? I explained it to him later that my […]
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April Fools
“It’s a joke,” Brian would say. Our relationship was just a joke. It was his way out whenever I started to make too much sense and he was likely to have to admit fault. Who even cares who’s responsible? It’s all a joke. I hate that the pain is unavoidable. I want to be over […]
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When He’s Done With You
I think he fucked someone else. I think I saw her that day he disappeared at the hotel. Just poof, gone. Came back like 45 minutes later. A friend of some friends, but I’ve never met her. He has a whole snapchat just for talking to her, no other friends, no other activity. The narcissist […]
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A Theory of Change
I was defending my relationship choices to someone recently and he kinda just virtually shook his head and threw up his hands, ready to back off about it. He had to warn me though that, “a leopard doesnt change its spots.” I maintained the opposite, insisting that they can, and that my particular wildcat already […]
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Careless
I don’t really wanna write this post, cuz I’ve got nothing to say. A would-be client went off on me, stating that I deserve all the awful things in my life because he couldn’t find someone else to book with three hours’ notice. Look, I get it and I have actually been better about this […]
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Let’s Try This Again
Here’s the math: The great freeze was in February of last year. That puts you at one year STRAIGHT, minus jail time, plus one month. So 12-3+1=10 already. Your 8 is immediately wrong. Hence the anger, you’re fucking lying to me and to yourself. Don’t fucking gaslight me. You’re welcome to site all three weeks […]
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Digging
If by some chance you were able to pull up my Plenty of Fish account from 2008, you’d find that I was much the same person I am now. I wasn’t matching with guys who posted pictures of their washboard abs, I wasn’t talking about hooking up with anything that moves, right now, because I’m […]
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Lies
A lie takes no responsibility. It shows no remorse. It demonstrates no respect for the lied-to party, they are disallowed their full autonomy. The decisions they make are coerced, manipulated for the gain of someone else. A lie is a violation to one’s humanity. Everything you said was a lie. The world will be better […]